When I was a kid, there were two initialisms used in my circle that were always pronounced as if they were French: HPA ("osh-pay-ah") and LPF ("el-pay-eff"). For the former, there was a brief period where the Portuguese pronunciation replaced the French, so the H was said as "aga."
HPA came from News Norm, the handwritten newspaper with made-up stories that my youngest sister produced when she was very young. (See "Swampgas Newsboy, by Bob Dictionary") One issue included a letter to the editor demanding that the fire department do more to "make sure the firemen are not sick or HPA." She had remembered that there was a three-letter initialism that referred to hyperactivity (she was thinking of "ADD") and had guessed it was probably HPA for hy-per-active. After that, "osh-pay-ah" became a way of referring to any sort of high-strung or manic behavior.
LPF came from a brief craze for using a sewing machine to make "long pointed floppy" hats -- long, limp cones of fabric, with no brim, that were generally three to five feet long.
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What brought these two initialisms back to mind was 1 Corinthians 13. I was thinking about the difficulty of translating the key word into English -- neither charity nor love is really adequate -- and thinking about the original Greek word (agape) made me think of HPA, the Portuguese version of which sounds a lot like agape; and then HPA reminded me of LPF.
I hadn't thought about LPFs in a good long time. The LPF craze was long before I knew any Hebrew or anything about the Temple, but that's the direction my thoughts went when I thought about "ell-pay-eff" now. It made me think of a Temple formula used in the past, consisting of three syllables including "pay" and "ale." One common interpretation is that these represent the Hebrew pe "mouth" and el "god," respectively. This made me wonder if eff could also be interpreted as Hebrew. My first thought was that it could be a truncation of efes, the modern Hebrew word for the numeral zero.
God Mouth Zero? Searching for that string turned up this 1996 Smashing Pumpkins EP. Pumpkins are a long-running sync theme, so I took that as synchronistic encouragement of this train of thought.
Thinking about eff as part of a Hebrew word reminded me of something I had seen on YouTube several days ago: emerging cult leader Shane Baldwin saying that the seven "angels" to whom the letters in Revelation 2-3 are addressed represent various prophets from different times in history ("dispensation heads," for those who know the Mormon lingo), and that "the angel of the church of Ephesus" is Joseph Smith. He said he first made that connection because both Joseph and Ephesus include the string eph. Thinking about this now in the context of LPF, I noticed that Ephesus includes not just eph but the complete word ephes, "zero." In fact, since the -us (-os in Greek) is just a grammatical suffix, varying from case to case, the real root name of the city is simply Ephes -- coinciding exactly with the Hebrew for "zero."
When I went to Baldwin's channel to try to track down the video in question, I noticed a new video claiming that a near-complete Quran engraved on gold plates had been discovered and that the hosts of another Mormon podcast, Stick of Joseph, had seen the plates. Stories like this come out from time to time and usually end up being hoaxes, but it piqued my curiosity enough that I typed stick of joseph quran into the search bar and pressed enter. These two videos were juxtaposed in the search results:
I am getting so sick of these "AI"-generated thumbnails. Is there any channel left that doesn't use them? Anyway, the sync fairies will make use of whatever is at hand. The first thumbnail says AGAPE in big letters, and the second says JOSEPH. I had just been thinking about the name Joseph in connection with the word for "zero," so it seems significant that Joseph's face is blanked out in the thumbnail, making him a "zero."












