Crack that whip

To begin with a digression, when I typed that post title I noticed that it was a spoonerism for "whack that Crip," raising the possibility that Devo songs are actually encrypted gangsta rap. This thought led me to the Wikipedia article on spoonerisms, which led to the one on crash blossoms, which led to the one on antanaclasis. The third in Wikipedia's list of examples of antanaclasis is none other than this:

Although we're apart, you're a part of me still. -- Lyrics from "Blueberry Hill" by Fats Domino.

I guess after you whack a Crip, they have a blue burial. That is, the Crip gets encrypted, which brings us full circle.

The title of the Devo song is actually not "Crack That Whip" but "Whip It," which is slang for nitrous oxide, also known as "hippie crack" -- a Crippy hack for getting high? No, actually they have a different drug of choice, or at least the Bong Leech Insane Crips do. Speaking of which, how is it that I never thought to call Kamala Harris "a gaffing lass on laughing gas" until just now? When you're high on nitrous, you giggle, which could thus be called a 'height sound," and the whippet is a sight hound. Have these puns hit rock bottom yet?

But this digression is spiraling out of control. This was actually meant to be a dream post.

When I was 12 or 13, there was a brief craze for making "whips" for cracking purposes. You cut a blackhaw wand about a yard long, clove-hitch a two-yard length of white string to the narrower end, and tie a few overhand knots in the string. With a bit of practice, you can get it to produce a terrifically loud crack.

I haven't thought about those blackhaw-and-string whips in ages, but last night I dreamt that I was trying to teach some kids to make them. The problem was a lack of suitable materials. All the kids could find were sticks that were much too short and thick. They didn't have any string, either. They improvised various substitutes -- a terrycloth belt from a bathrobe, a wide strip of fabric cut from a flag (blue and white, possibly Greek or Israeli), even a nylon jacket -- but obviously you can't crack a jacket.