Don’t do trucks, kits

Lots of Samoans have told me this. I’ll go easy on the eye-dialect to keep it readable, but you should be reading it in the heaviest Samoan accent you can manage:

The D in trucks stands for dumb, because trucks make you dumb.

The R stands for ridiculous because doing trucks is so ridiculous.

The U stands for ockly, because you look so ockly when you are doing the trucks.

And the Chee? The Chee stands for crazy!

Cue uproarious laughter. I can’t count how many times I’ve heard the same group of Samoans tell this one to each other, but somehow it never gets old.

I just wanted to make sure no one takes the psychedelic-adjacent content of some of my syncs as an endorsement. Stay away from that stuff.

As William Wright says, your body is there to protect you if you don’t mess with it, so don’t. Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah.